Eve's Corner
Column #15
April/2008
Letters from Readers
I've been getting a lot of feedback about the columns lately, and now it's time to print some of them.
If you ever decide to send comments, ask questions or furnish helpful scene info to other spanking people, please let me know if they are intended for print and it goes without saying, that everything is will be discreetly edited printed anonymously or with your scene play name if you wish. Send comments to: Evehoward@mindspring.com
Dear Eve,
I very much enjoyed your latest column. I grew up around the same time that you did, watching for spankings on TV and thumbing through boring romance novels, just searching for spankings or even references. I'm so grateful to you and Tony and Shadow Lane for finally making my spanking fantasies come true, at the age of 50. I'm 55 now and have been to several parties but I missed the last
two and it is uncertain whether I'll make the next one. I haven't been in the chatroom much lately but I'm going to try and pop back in. So many people come and go and I wonder what has happened to them and whether they are happy spanking or getting spanked. Thanks again and I have no problems if you want to post this.
Best,
K. J.
Hi Eve,
What a lovely piece on the passions of confessions on spanking. I enjoyed it immensely.
It reminded me so much of my own trail, of trial and errors so to speak. Don't ask me why I was wired the same way you were. I did not enjoy the Public school whippings. But would be utterly fascinated at the thought of being put across a pretty girl/woman's hosed thighs for a bare bottom spanking. I would imagine her slowly preparing me, lowering my trousers and underpants as she teased me about the spanking I was about to get.
Well once I got over my shyness on the subject I would steer the conversation around to spanking and was quite successful most of the time. Why? Because I would take the time to cultivate the woman concerned. That's why it amuses me when I see pithy one-liners in groups. Like, “I'm Fred, spank me in Manhattan.” Sheesh.
I switch and love turning a bottom that lovely shade of red as she squirms on my lap, let alone the other lovely things that can happen after lol.
God Bless, and keep spanking.
M.
Dear Eve,
Many of our thoughts are obviously drawn from our childhood. I am aroused with two other related subjects (possible fetishes): patches sewn onto the seat of a pair of jeans or pant or a skirt; and the idea of having a woman's
name tattooed onto my bottom.
There are several metaphors that can be drawn from this: the sewing is a spanking; the patch represents a brand or sense of humiliation; and other overtones.
The Rex Trailer Show, a kids cowboy show in Boston in the 1960s would sometimes have a sewing contest as part of the schedule of games for the day. A team would be one girl and one boy. There may be two to four teams (all were volunteers). The girls would sit in a chair and the boys would lie across their knee or lap. Of course all of the other kids in the audience would laugh at first. The girls were giving a sewing kit including a patch. There was a time limit and the object was to sew a patch onto the
seat of the pant of the boys. During the sewing contest the camera would focus on the expression of the boys having their seats patched. The best sewing / patch job won. During the judging, with the boys still turned over
the girls knee, they would ask them how their team did. I always felt sorry for the boys, now I wish I could have been one of them. To be turned over a girl's knee in front of a lot of other people and on TV, while a patch is being sewn onto the seat of your pants would be exciting.
Fortunately in the 1970s patches on jeans were common. I had a few patched pair of jeans and a lot of girls at school wore patches on their jeans. I would sometimes deliberately tear a hole in the seat to get a patch. I
wonder if my Mom ever suspected anything?
There were several other shows where someone tore or burnt the seat of their pants and had to be patched. Sometimes the patching was done as part of the show.
My interest in patches is really just a subset of spanking. Sometimes now I put a large iron on patch on the bottom of a nice pair of underwear. And of course wear these while being spanked.
2) Tattooed Bottoms
I like the idea of having a women's name tattooed onto my bottom. I asked my wife about having her name tattooed onto my bottom and she politely declined. Sometimes I do lie across her knee during the spankings and she writes her name and messages onto my bottom with a pen. Again this is really a subset of spanking. I would love to have a small patch tattooed onto my bottom.
After writing the letter, I still may not be interested in reading spanking novels and stories, however it may be enjoyable to try to write some.
T.H.
Dear T.H.,
I collect anecdotes of different spanking related fetishes and this is the first mention I've ever heard of a patch fetish! Interesting.
I've found that the four fetishes most commonly paired with spanking as side or complimentary fetishes are: bondage, tickling, cross dressing and anal. (Not all at once though. Except occasionally.)
Other unusual spanking side fetishes I've come across have been: open bottomed girdles and clowns. (Though again, not together.)
The final comment was also very characteristic of quite a few spanking enthusiasts, referring to the fact that writing out their own highly particularized fantasies (and presumably reading them over and over again) was preferable to consuming the fantasies of others. I'll bet there are more than a couple of people reading this now who have created elaborate spanking fantasy worlds with characters they keep going back to and developing the adventures of, perhaps to share them with scene friends they email with, perhaps just to keep them to themselves. I would guess this is not true of just spanking fetishists, but of all fetishists the world over. The urge to creatively express one's feelings and preferences about one's fetish, as well as to analyze those thoughts, is a universally shared trait.
Eve,
You need a column on domestic discipline. Of course the Christians are in it. http://www.christiandomesticdiscipline.com/Home.html What a way to justify your kink. The Bible says so.
Of course the feminists have a harder time with it. http://disciplinedfeminist.blogspot.com
This is the first time I have ever heard of someone wearing a Domestic Discipline ring to show that their SO, or Head of Household has the right to spank them.
Another good site is: http://www.vickiblue.com/home.html. Of course you have to read the Slap Happy article in Bitch magazine. Slap Happy-In a spanking-new form of
relationship therapy, self-described feminists are asking for
it.http://www.bitchmagazine.org/issue/39
There is a great picture of a public spanking on spring break on this site. http://www.spankingblog.com/
As far as movies are concerned. The last of five Thin Man movies has a great scene where William Powell spanks Myrna Loy in front of his parents. The look on her face is priceless.
H.
Hi Eve,
I really enjoyed reading about your adventures. It's good to read something about you that gives some insight as to what "makes you tick", so to speak.
I myself have known I was into spanking since I was around 5 or 6 years old or so. It was something I kept to myself for a long time. I actually thought there might be something wrong with me and that I should keep these thoughts hidden from others. I was very confused by my thoughts. I knew that somewhere out there, there were others like myself because at 5 years old, my seven year old cousin showed me a book he found under my grandfather's bed. It was a paperback, with a picture on the front cover of a lady bent over with her dress up around her waist. She was facing directly forward. There was a stern looking man standing next to her holding her around the waist with one arm and the other arm raised, ready to bring his hand down on her obviously vulnerable backside. The look on her face was one of alarm mixed with pleasure. I will never forget that picture. I am now 43 years old and I haven't forgot it yet. I think it was from that moment in time, that I knew what would kick-start my own motor for the rest of my life.
I am a switchable male. When I see attractive women, I often imagine them draped over my knee with my handprints on their ass. Then I imagine what they would look like sternly swinging their arms (often with there bare breast swaying) in an effort to redden my backside.
During High School I told one young lady that I was dating that I was into spanking and she said she did not want to be spanked. Why would I want to hurt her like that if I loved her, she asked. I tried, but could not make her understand. When I asked her about spanking me she said she did not want to hurt me. She simply did not get it. She came back into my life about 3 years ago (as a friend). Now she gets it. Too bad, we are both married to other people.
Eventually, I discovered that there were thousands of other people just like me, maybe millions, thanks to the wonderful world of porn! I was at a little adult bookstore in Charlotte, NC where I found a copy of "Spank Hard", a publication I believe you used to work for. Anyway, I was then 18. I decided from then on that when I met someone I thought I might have a future with I would tell her about my proclivity for spanking. If she couldn't handle it, I would not waste my time.
I once had a friend of about 49 or 50 when I was in my early 30s. She was helping me clean my house one day to get it ready for a date that I was to have with a lady closer to my own age (she was a really good friend). She sent me to the store to get some cleanser while she stayed at my house to keep cleaning. When I got back she asked me about some spanking magazines and videos that she found in my bedroom while I was gone. I explained it all to her, but she just seemed perplexed. She said she never knew people did such things with each other for enjoyment. She asked me if I would loan her some of the videos so she could watch them in private. I agreed and thought maybe it would help her understand. A couple of weeks went by and I went to her house for what I thought would be another innocent visit. She told me that ever since she watched those videos that she hadn't been able to get those images out of her mind. Then she blew my mind. She asked me if I would spank her! (she said she might understand it better if she tried it) I told her I would be happy to. I explained the use of a "safe-word" and had her pick one. She asked me if I would mind spanking her on the bare butt and I replied, "I wouldn't have it any other way". She then surprised me again by completely stripping (until this time I had not seen her naked before). She draped herself across my lap and I turned her pretty little butt a beautiful shade of bright red. When I told her she could get up off my lap, she said I would not be a good friend if I left her in this condition and did not finish her off. Realizing what she meant I reached to her private spot and found it to be dripping wet. I used my hand to bring her to such an orgasm that she was throwing her head back and crying out in wild abandon. Alas, this wasn't meant to be, as she was a good friend, but not the potential spouse I was looking for to raise a family with. She had already raised a family and did not want to raise another one. I often remember her with great fondness. What a chance encounter that was! She was such an open-minded person.
These days, most of my guy friends know that I like to spank women but not that I like to be spanked as well. On the other hand, most of the women that I have shared this information with know that I like to switch. I am most comfortable keeping things this way in my social circles here at home. However, if I ever make it to Vegas, to one of your parties... I will be then with like-minded people who will understand without passing judgment. I will keep no secrets.
Your friend,
F.D.
Eve,
I am an Englishman living in Oregon, and love to spank women. I remember, many years ago, spanking my sister's best friend. Since that time I've spanked a number of women.
Some were women that had responded to advertisements I'd placed in a local newspaper. Others were women with whom I was having a sexual relationship, and spanking, in these cases, was something that I introduced them to.
I used to attend play parties, but these encompassed flogging, bondage, etc. My preference is for spanking, caning, and the use of various household implements, e.g. hairbrush, slipper, and spatula.
I hope, as a man that loves anal sex, that the experience of which you write did not turn you off the idea of anal sex.
Best wishes,
A.
Dear A.,
Thanks for writing! Good tip about placing personal ads in local newspapers. I know a lot of people who have made connections that way.
Anal play can be very stimulating, but it has to be with the right person at the right time and done with sensitivity and fastidiousness.
Eve
Hi Eve,
You can publish the following if you want. PS, your
Freudian slip made me giggle: "trash reading pubic"
Thank you for another great Eve's Corner.
I'm a female submissive who has been a Shadow Lane
customer since my early 20's, and a member since my
mid-20's. Now, at 30, I have plenty of company in my
age bracket, and friends of every age. I met a long
time play partner through a Shadow Lane personal ad I
posted, and although I am no longer single, I enjoy
the chat room and bulletin board.
I watched "I Love Lucy" and "Leave it to Beaver" in
re-runs and thoroughly enjoy over-the-knee spanking,
but I am perhaps more the "next generation spanking
enthusiast" who posts and responds to personal ads,
goes to play events with friends, and discusses
safewords with a potential partner. I enjoy being
naked and bound, collared, and cropped. I do indeed
collect fine specimens of implements and call my top
"Sir". But I don't know that I'm always dreadfully
serious. I will tease and flirt, pout and flounce off.
What type of spanking? As we know, the answer to
"Sex?" is "Yes, please!" It's the same with spanking.
Spanking? "Yes, please!"
Midnight Sky
Dear Eve,
I have a MySpace and used to have another journal where I have received numerous messages from women, especially women age 40 and over, who write how they have known from childhood they were interested in spanking, but they suppress this, even to this very day, and even from their husbands. I can name three people dying to be spanked, who have never been spanked, and who are too afraid to admit to anyone else they wish to be spanked. I advocate for open communication, but for some reason, it remains something they cannot overcome. They are afraid of rejection from their husbands and have refused to take my advice on ways to bring up the topic, i.e. joking about needing a spanking, reaching over a guy's lap and accidentally falling onto the lap (and joking about needing a spanking), or even spanking the guy and see if one can get him to spank her back. A couple of these women, if they have been unable to resolve their fears by Labor Day, may in fact be at your party.
As for me, I have had all kinds of reaction. I have met people who absolutely think spanking is only for perverts, and had one woman tell me she sees no different between people interested in being spanked and rapists. On the positive side, I have had much good fortune. I too remember play spanking at a young age with the girl across the street. In fact, her play acting of being a bad girl and I being the father was her idea. In high school, I still thought spanking was a taboo, but I used to ask girls about their parental spankings, and was amazed at how open many were at telling me all about them. While suggesting spanking was met with resistance, I never found a girl who turned down a birthday spanking on her birthday, and a few went on to enjoy subsequent spankings. College was a little different, as I did meet women openly interested in spanking. I even had a woman literally apologize for something and place herself over my lap. How is that for an introduction? We dated for two years after that,
In later life, I led more of a vanilla life until once the woman I was with did something wrong and asked me to spank her as punishment. She previously thought spanking was wrong but did it in fun only because she knew I liked it. I spanked her for real, and she discovered she enjoyed it even though this was a real spanking, without a warm-up. From then on, she was hooked.
My ending advice: I think spanking is a widely practiced taboo, and many interested in it know it is a taboo and won't admit to the interest. I urge couples to discuss their interest, and hopefully they will be surprised if a loving significant other turns out to not only be accommodating but learns to enjoy it as well.
P